Other Doctors the NBA Should Have Partnered With Instead Of Dr. Oz

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Recently, the NBA announced a childhood health education initiative, getting players into classrooms to teach students about the benefits of exercise and eating right. This is an important thing, as childhood, indeed regular, obesity is rampant in the United States. According to the CDC, in 2012, more than one third of children and adolescents were overweight or obese. Childhood obesity can have devastating short-and-long-term effects, as children and adolescents who are obese are likely to be obese adults, putting them at risk for health issues such as heart disease, stroke and type two diabetes, just to name a few.

While the NBA’s heart is in the right place, their execution is immediately flawed because of their chosen partner for the initiative: Dr. Oz. As Tom Ziller of SBNation explains:

Dr. Oz is basically a legitimate and respected cardiac surgeon who moonlights as a slightly less paranoid Kevin Trudeau. He recently had to testify before a Congressional committee on his huckstering of unregulated dietary supplements he often claims to be miracle drugs on The Dr. Oz Show. He’s been eviscerated by John Oliver. Dr. Oz does actually tell his viewers that diet and exercise are the best medicine, but he does that quietly in between fits of loudly selling them magical beans that sometimes have harmful effects. (It’s hard to know how harmful, because the supplements are usually not FDA-approved.)

This is puzzling, especially for an initiative as necessary and potentially positive as this one. Perhaps the NBA couldn’t find a less controversial doctor with as high of a public image as Dr. Oz. Then again, it’s not as if Dr. Oz’s public image at the moment is all that positive. Even then, did the NBA really need to partner with a celebrity doctor? Couldn’t they have aligned themselves with one of the organizations Ziller mentions later on in the article, mitigating the initiative’s appearance as a publicity stunt?

Or, why not go in a different direction? Instead of a real doctor who occasionally peddles maybe-not-real medicine, why not partner with a fake doctor who peddles real medicine?

Dr. Cox

On the surface, Dr. Cox may not be the best choice to speak to children. He’s sarcastic to a fault, at times even plain mean. He’d probably make the kids cry, which isn’t the best result with children. Usually, you want to take the uplifting, empowering approach. Dr. Cox more prefers to tear people down. Except when he’s providing a teaching moment, and the music goes soft and lighthearted and we all learn a valuable lesson about life.

But underneath the gruff exterior is man who cares with every fiber of his being. Remember that episode where he lost three patients and went on a bender that rendered him mute and unshaven until JD talked him out of it? That’s the kind of doctor, the kind of caring these kids need.

Doc Holliday

I can see why the NBA would shy away from Doc Holliday. First off, he’s not even an actual doctor, just a dentist. Second, he has consumption, and he probably wouldn’t even be sober most of the time.

Dr. House

A pill-popping, cynical, rule-breaking genius doctor? Adam Silver would love him.

Doogie Howser, M.D.

Doogie would’ve either been the best choice, or the worst choice. The best, because he’d be the closest in age to the children. He’d be able to talk to them in their language, sounding more like a peer than a superior adult. On the other hand, this could work against him, as the kids might not respect his knowledge and authority, citing the fact that he’s not much older than him, so why should they have to listen to him?

Dr. John Thackery

Dr. Thackery works at the Knickbocker hospital — the Knick for short —  in New York, and, as it just so happens, the NBA has a team in New York named the Knickerbockers — the Knicks, for short. This was meant to be — just imagine the tie-ins. Then again, Thackery’s medical knowledge is mainly limited to the practices of the 1900s, plus, he’s a cocaine addict. Maybe not the best idea.

Dr. Zoidberg

Dr. Hannibal Lecter

Because he’s already such a great mentor to adolescents.

Why not?

Jim McCoy

Dammit, Adam, I’m a doctor not a dietitian.

Dr. Dre

Maybe the NBA just forgot about him. 

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I don’t doubt the NBA’s at least partially sincere about this effort to address and reduce childhood obesity. But partnering with Dr. Oz — an actual doctor but a shady shill nonetheless — cheapens the initiative.